peeing in bottles
I'm about to clean my "room". I would rather call it my plywood cubicle.
Cleaning mostly means sweeping the tile floor, taking my two rugs outside and shaking them into clouds of dust, and throwing out all my trash and pee bottles--yeah. I, uh, pee, in bottles in my room sometimes. It's just so freakin cold outside and you have to wear a full uniform if you go out and I hate using the porta-potty and they make us wear a reflector belt everywhere we go and sometimes I drink so much water that I have to pee every fifteen minutes. So, yeah, I pee in bottles sometimes. You aren't in Iraq. You don't know what it's like. You think it's gross, you think it's lazy. You don't know. You try peeing in a porta-potty for a couple weeks and have some crazy insurgents shoot mortars into your neighborhood once in a while unexpectedly and then just wait. I bet once your plastic communal potty has a couple shrapnel holes in it like mine does, I bet then you'll have some second thoughts about the etiquet of peeing in bottles.
Besides, once my brother and his friends saved up a bucket of pee at his school and then they chased some girls, I think, with it and spilled it all out in front of their dorm building. That's disgusting.
We can forgive him though because now my parents are going to read this and then they may have something to say to him. Me, however, I'm in Iraq. My parents can't do anything to me. I can pee anywhere and any way I want.
Cleaning mostly means sweeping the tile floor, taking my two rugs outside and shaking them into clouds of dust, and throwing out all my trash and pee bottles--yeah. I, uh, pee, in bottles in my room sometimes. It's just so freakin cold outside and you have to wear a full uniform if you go out and I hate using the porta-potty and they make us wear a reflector belt everywhere we go and sometimes I drink so much water that I have to pee every fifteen minutes. So, yeah, I pee in bottles sometimes. You aren't in Iraq. You don't know what it's like. You think it's gross, you think it's lazy. You don't know. You try peeing in a porta-potty for a couple weeks and have some crazy insurgents shoot mortars into your neighborhood once in a while unexpectedly and then just wait. I bet once your plastic communal potty has a couple shrapnel holes in it like mine does, I bet then you'll have some second thoughts about the etiquet of peeing in bottles.
Besides, once my brother and his friends saved up a bucket of pee at his school and then they chased some girls, I think, with it and spilled it all out in front of their dorm building. That's disgusting.
We can forgive him though because now my parents are going to read this and then they may have something to say to him. Me, however, I'm in Iraq. My parents can't do anything to me. I can pee anywhere and any way I want.
posted by james t nath at 11:45 PM
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